Or you local people might call it "Sod's Law". There have been many corollaries over the years, but in the end, if something can go wrong, it will. It's all about timing. So, my husband is working overseas for a while. We accepted this, made the decision, and forged ahead. Living apart is nothing new to us, and with the Internet and free phone calls, it's not as bad as it might seem.
Everyone keeps asking me, "When is he going to visit?" as if he is going to come racing home every weekend, simply to spend less than 2 days here. Not being funny, but that's a bit unrealistic considering the travel arrangements, not to mention costs. We figured we'd just wait to see when his schedule allowed a bit of vacation time, and go with that.
Last week, he got the word that he will have the last 2 weeks of April. I checked the calendar and sighed. There really isn't a worse time. If he got his vacation when I was in the States in May, then he'd visit someone else, or just enjoy the time off. But life is not that simple. Why?
Because I am currently training for my 2nd degree black belt. When we made the decision for me to stay here in N.Ireland, it became a goal. I had the time to put in the effort and train 4 times per week, forging ahead and getting the belt. I think we honestly didn't expect vacation time until summer, anyway. My test is the first weekend of May. Those final 2 weeks will be stressful and I can't afford to get sick. And he ALWAYS gets sick on vacation...which means so do I. Add to that: Passover.
Normally this wouldn't be a problem, but Iain doesn't keep kosher during Passover. The few years he HAS been home he's been working, so he'd have his normal cereal and sandwiches at work, and be OK with a grain-free dinner. But now he'll be home for all meals, and I won't be able to go out to eat at many places! I can't really force him to eat Matzoh, can I?
Now, don't get me wrong, I am happy he'll be able to visit. It just comes at a bad time.
What would you do? Would you give up your own activities and things in your own life? Am I being selfish in saying that we'll have to work with my plans as well? Should I work my schedule around his, no matter what? Personally, I am happy that my husband respects my own independence and is OK with the fact that my own activities might conflict with his vacation time. If he gets sick, he'll sleep in the other room. If he wants a real sandwich, he might just have to walk into town and get one. Mostly, he'll be happy to hang out with Loki while I am at JuJitsu, not having to do any work for a change!